Is this weird lol

I’ve been doing dumb stuff lately n out of no where I decided I’m changing my life I’m 19 n I shouldn’t be doing the things I do but I have the urge to do better in life n also I’ve had a urge to read more into spiritualism n meditation n stuff like that. I’ve been seeing a lot of these posts on almost all of my social media. Do I sound crazy 😭 also I don’t mean to offend anyone if anything I’ve said sounds wrong it’s not my intention.