When to tell?

Question

I lost my last baby at 13 weeks after I had already told all of my family. Now I'm too afraid to tell anyone. I've only told my parents and people are work who have to know. 
 I'm 15 weeks. The midwife says the pregnancy is really textbook and looks great. The genetic test came back great. I've had no problems except a thyroid issue that is being treated.  I just have this big fear that there's not going to be a heartbeat next time even though I think it may be irrational. 
I feel like I'll never be comfortable telling anyone that I'm having a baby, but I think my husband's family deserves to know. 
Add to this-- that my sister in law just had 2 miscarriages and I feel so bad telling her, and then my other sister in law is due any day now to have a baby, so I'm afraid of taking away from their excitement. Such a tough situation. Wondering if anyone had advice or insight. Does this fear ever go away?

Answer

The fear will always be there but you have to make a choice as to whether you’ll let that fear take over or not, and only you can do that. Also tell when your ready, it’s understandable for you not to tell anyone if you don’t want to. I was 20 weeks before I told most people that I was pregnant. I do feel like if your family knows then your husbands should as well, but that’s a decision you both can make together. Best of luck to you on your journey.

Answer

I completely understand how you feel. I lost my baby boy at 20 weeks. Stillbirth. Going tot hat anatomy scan and being told there was no heart beat was awful. I still remember the wretched sound that came from my throat as I screamed and cried. My biggest fear had come true. That was June 2017. 
I am now 14 weeks 4 days today and every scan, ever OB appointment I am full of anxiety. Afraid there will be no heart beat. Especially the closer it gets to the 20 weeks scan. I honestly don’t think that fear will go away till I’m holding my healthy baby in my arms. 
I started by only telling my mom and my husbands sister. A few weeks later I told my brother and sister and grandmother. We waited till 12 weeks and I was so unsure if announcing. I remember how awful it was to tell everyone that I lost my baby boy. 
But I also thought about it I don’t announce and the baby ends up going full term and being healthy, I will regret not sharing the exciting news with everyone I love. I don’t want that. Because as scared as I am, I am beyond excited for this little one I’m growing. So we announced. 
I also had family and friends that are pregnant and recently lost a baby. They all were so happy for me. 
After I lost my baby boy my cousin got pregnant and one of my best friends. They were both afraid to tell me. When they did I felt awful that they were afraid to tell me. I’d never want that. Of course I was nothing but excited and happy for them! 
So sorry about your loss. And congratulations and sticky dust!! 💕

When to tell?

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