Vilomah means 'against the natural order". The grey-haired should never bury those with dark hair. As in our children should not precede us in death. If they do, we are vilomahed.

Shortly after my husband and I buried our Diana. I was standing in a lineup at a store and the woman behind me was complaining about how her daughter was always calling or showing up for advice. To which I replied that she must be a good mother for her daughter to find comfort in going to her when she was troubled. The lady snorted and just started complaining even harder about how useless and helpless her kids are. How she even regretted even having them.

Her words stung deep, with my whole body and soul I wanted what that woman had.

I wanted my baby girl to grow up.

I wanted her to feel like she could call me whenever she needed help or simply a listening ear.

I tried to tell that woman how very blessed she was that her daughter trusted her but my attention only fed her bitterness. I finally turned my back to her because I couldn’t hold a brave face anymore and as I stood there it took everything in me not to crumble to the floor under the pain that engulfed me. To absolutely not hate that woman for her attitude.

I had just buried my daughter and would never get that call from her.

I have since wondered a few times, What one word or title is given to an angels parent?

Maybe if I had the words I could have told that woman in the store and she would have stoped for a moment and appreciated her daughter. Most likely as it more often does, it would have simply made her uncomfortable talking to me.

But then at least I wouldn’t have to hear it.

How could I say this is a sensitive topic without going into detail?

There is widow or widower meaning empty for the person who has lost a partner and orphan for the child who has been deprived of parental care.

What one word would describe the parents grieving for the child we cannot see.

I finally found it... The word is Vilomah

Tu me manques Diana Je t'aimerai pour toujours