Working again?


I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 9 week old baby. I’ve been struggling a lot trying to juggle 2 kids now, keeping up with the house work, etc. I babysit out of my home and when I went on my maternity leave I told the parents I would re-open my in home daycare on the 4th of January. Well I’ve been very depressed, crying almost everyday multiple times a day, and feeling like I’m drowning. I called my midwife to set up an appointment because my husband and mom think I have ppd. I am suppose to see my midwife on Tuesday and I’m guessing she’s probably going to start me on medication. I’m so depressed and am feeling so guilty for how terrible of a job I’m doing with my two perfect babies... and now I’m realizing that the 4th of January isn’t very far away and I’m honestly not even sure how I could handle watching/taking care of another 4-5 kids a day... I’m thinking about reaching out to the parents to explain to them what’s going on but then again I don’t want a lot of people to know if I am struggling with ppd. I don’t know what to do... should I try to re-open or should I let the parents know what’s happening and that I’m not going to be able to re-open right now?