Is it weird I’m a little upset about this?

So my sex drive is much higher than my bf’s. We’ve talked about it a lot and I totally understand that we’re on different levels but it really does make our relationship a little difficult! He always comes after like 2 minutes and won’t initiate anything unless I do first. But the thing is he’s always down to do things if I initiate, he just never is the one to start it. It kinda sucks feeling like I’m always throwing myself on him but at least he still responds well and is always down to mess around as long as *I* always start it.

So the thing is some days I just tell him I wish he would initiate more and he always says he will but nothing really changes. Because although he always is down anytime I initiate I just get so tired of being the first one to do it. And he swears up and down “I DO wanna have sex with you at any time, I am always attracted to you and I love doing things with you but for some reason I am just bad at initiating.” So I asked if there was a reason like if maybe he’s just too shy or nervous or what it could be? And he said he didn’t know but he’d promise to figure out why he’s rarely the first to start things.

And honestly it would be different if he said he just wasn’t down to do it sometimes but he told me he is literally down to do it any time, any day. And it’s not like I’m initiating every single day, we only ever fool around like every other day or every two days (we live together so we’re with each other quite often). I feel like having him initiate every other day isn’t too much to ask since he says he’s always down to have sex?

I just feel like him figuring out within himself why he doesn’t take the initiative (shyness, fear, insecurity, etc.) would be super beneficial to our relationship but he still hasn’t thought about it. It was never brought up again after he said he would try and figure it out a few weeks ago:/

Anyway, the other day he snapchatted me this tea that he got that’s for increasing libido in men and honestly it just felt really meaningful because it showed that he was making an effort to make our sex life more of a priority! It really warmed my heart especially since he’s never talked about it any more. Well on Christmas Day he showed me what he got his little (15 year-old) brother for Christmas..it was the tea. It wasn’t for my bf, it was for his 15 year old brother as a gag gift.

Honestly it felt kinda hurtful. Because he could’ve gotten it for himself knowing the issues we’ve been having with me feeling like I’m always initiating..but he just got is as a gag gift for his underage brother who doesn’t even drink tea.

Idk I just saw it as him not taking it seriously after we had talked about it and after I thought he was actually making an effort to improve our sex life...:/ am I wrong for feeling hurt about it? I just don’t know what else to do. Should i say something to him? I just wish he would treat our sex life as something special and to be worked on as i do because he knows I’m not fully satisfied.

Any advice appreciated. Thank you❤️