Asking if I want kids
So my boyfriend and I went into this relationship talking about one day having kids. Ive always wanted to be a mom and in the beginning he would say stuff like oh you would make an amazing mother to our kids and stuff like that. We talked about it quite a bit. A few months ago he randomly said he doesn’t want kids and he proceeded with an entire list of why he doesn’t want kids... this crushed me but I am not going to have kids with someone who doesn’t want kids. So when he said this he was like so what do you think and to be honest I was in shock so I said yeah I agree I don’t think it is a good idea. Ever since then I have been convincing myself that having children would not be a good idea because I am still hurt by the stuff he said to me. I have tried to talk to him about if something changed with him or why he all of the sudden doesn’t want kids and if he really feels like he doesn’t want kids and he said nothing has changed he just doesn’t want kids.... now when we see a commercial/ movie with a kid or a parent with a child in public he says how sweet the kid is or what he thinks about different parenting methods. I have just been completely cold about the situation and every time he brings it up I just get my heart broken all over again. So last night we were watching tv and a commercial with a mother and her child came on and I guess he saw me looking at the tv with a look of “we’ll that will never be our life” (regret I guess) and he asked me if I wanted kids.... I immediately said no because I am not gonna go through this conversation again of why he doesn’t want kids. he has also been saying stuff here and there like “if a woman is hell bent on having kids look out” and women get crazy when they have kids” and “women change when they have kids” and I’m like uhh yeah women do change a child is a huge responsibility.... so I am at a loss with what is going on in his head.. I do not want to make him feel like he can’t change his mind or that he is trapped. I know I am lucky that we know he doesn’t want kids before we had any but it still crushed me and I am completely confused. what do you think is going on with him? I know I need to talk to him but I don’t want to keep talking to him about it and just to hear the same thing over and over when I already know the answer so idk. what do you think. Sorry this is so long I just needed to vent.