Am I jealous?

Yes.

That my cousin just had another perfectly healthy baby? Yes.

That my friend has four kids already and is pregnant again? Yes.

That my co-worker is pregnant by accident? Yes.

That the majority of people never experience baby or pregnancy loss? Yes.

That people see a positive pregnancy test and that results in a baby for them? Yes.

That the majority of people get pregnant in a fair amount of time? Yes.

That other people find ultrasounds so joyous and I find them to be terrifying? Yes.

I'm fucking jealous. I'm angry and I'm fucking jealous. I don't know what to do with these emotions.