My sister asked me what I was going to do with the baby. Up until that point I didn't even think about it. I suppose I was just trying to cope with the fact that my baby is not alive inside me anymore and what to do next.

Our first ultrasound had baby with a very low heart rate. Only 81 bpm 😔 Our follow up ultrasound the next week, at 8 weeks, showed no heartbeat at all. It was another week before I saw my doctor to discuss options and then a week ago at 10 weeks I took misoprostol to help my body along.

So her question had me thinking. I didn't want to just let it be flushed away. That just didn't seem right for me. This was my baby, even for the smallest time it brought so much love to us.

So we decided when the time came to save what we could and then plant some sort of tree or shrub with it.

It seems kind of gross but I didn't let a single thing that came out of me, that could have possibly been my baby, be lost and washed away. It was actually pretty educational. Also kind of gross but I went through every part that I collected looking to see if I could see it.

I know at 7/8 weeks it was just going to be a tiny thing among a lot of gross bits...but there was something healing about it. And I'm pretty sure I found my tiny baby. It made me feel like I did something good, while for whatever reason it's life was cut short I could make sure it could have something special.

So once we decide on a plant/tree we will put our baby to rest with it and have a beautiful memorial to honor that small life 💕

Has anyone else done anything like that?