Last year I got pregnant with twins. I was terrified my boyfriend told it’s my body. My parents (all 4) pushed abortion. One of my parents is my boss and threatened to fire me. If I was fired I’d lose my apt and be homeless. Then my dad threatened to take my daughter. At that point I lost it. She is my world and I promised to protect her no matter what. In the end between my boss and all of my parent pressing me and threatening me I aborted and told myself it’s what I had to do. The dad and I broke up and went through hell. Now we are together having issue after issue and arguing a lot. I don’t want that life for my daughter and my unborn child. Yes I’m pregnant again. But I’m scared. No one is my family knows and I’m just about 10 weeks. No one not even my grandma supported me last time. I feel so alone. And every time he’s mad he tells me to abort the baby. I can’t. I hated myself for so long and still kind of do. I’ve been working on forgiveness. But now I’m guarded and scared I’m all alone when they find out. I literally am sleeping in my daughters room because I feel like i need to protect her. I’m perched sitting like a watch dog unable to sleep. 😔

I’m so lost.