Baby shower sadness

So this is my first baby and we had losses and issues before so this baby is my little miracle.

I really want a baby shower but I have like 3 friends, my family are far away and not really involved, his family some live far and others are covid freaks lol so I dont want to have a shower with like 4 people there, its kinda sad....

Anybody ever been in this situation?

I feel like im always missing out in fun things because I have no one in my life 😭