We’re doing it!

I had posted the other day about having a third kid and allll the anxieties I had about it. I got a lot of responses, most of which told me to not do it or I didn’t sound “ready”. All my friends with 3 kids said the same thing. They said wait for my oldest (2.5) to get a bit older first.

I hear you. I respect your opinions and advice. BUT, the facts are: everyone is different.

After my first, I wasn’t keen on two. I don’t love the newborn stage, as this momma needs rest! Ha. But after my second, I couldn’t imagine NOT having two kids. Life is chaotic. Some days I feel stretched thin. Some days I feel like there isn’t enough of me to go around. Going in public can be stressful. And both my kids sleep through the night, so we’re finally in a good place with a balance.

My toddler still needs potty trained and to transition to a big girl bed.

BUT, even as I think about the logistics and how for 2-3 years, it will be so HARD...I think about the pros. Joy. The joy of a big family trumps it all. There is a much greater chance I would regret NOT having a third kid. We have the space. We have the essential baby things. We are set for success.

How did we get here? Some of you will judge me, and that’s okay. My husband REALLY wants a boy. He looooves being a girl dad, but he wants a boy to name after his best friend who passed away. It’s important to him. However, he’s perfectly happy with a third girl. He grew up in a big family and he loved it. Our kids bring us so much joy (and stress), that it’s hard for him to imagine not having more.

I told him I sometimes still feel overwhelmed with two. Our infant is only 7 months old. Our cars are small. It would be hard to manage the house. Going in public alone with 3 small kids would be terrible, etc.

...but then I started to come around. I told him that while in the military, we can’t have three kids. I am a SAHM, but I still depend on him for help in the evenings and weekends. If he were to deploy for a year, I couldn’t handle 3 kids alone. I also told him we would need a van. I made him agree on a girl name prior to consenting to a third child, as well. And I asked him to agree to a vasectomy.

His last day in the military is the end of September. Yesterday, we bought a 2022 Honda Odyssey 😅. We’ve agreed on a name. He swears he will get the vasectomy.

So in December, we will start trying! My two daughters are currently 23 months apart and it’s a great age gap. We want our kids close in age. We have big age gaps with some of our siblings and it really stinks! I’m also 31 and he is 42. We want to finish having kids and raise them while still young!

It will be hard, but it always improves around 4 months for me when we sleep train. Ha.

We still have goals. They are still within reach. Will we be jet setting around the globe every summer? Probably not. Will we ever have consistent date nights? Probably not. But it’s about what you want from life. I don’t need a ton of freedom. A couple hours at the end of the day to read a book or watch TV while folding laundry will suffice. Being a mom is more important to me than any other thing I could ever want to do. ❤️

I stand by my decision. And if you want the same, don’t let anyone convince you it isn’t right. Every person and family is different.