What would you do?

Long story short (as possible), my dad is a narcissistic, alcoholic. So when I moved out and had my son, I got sick of his shit really quick after 2 months of trying so hard to give him a chance. I haven’t spoken to him and he’s made no effort to reach out to me. For as long as I can remember, he’s been beyond toxic to me. When I was younger, he was physically aggressive. Then in my teenage years, he was emotionally abusive. He causes a big blowout over nothing, either “apologizes” or gaslights you, and then does it again. I hit my last straw with our “relationship” when he started to talk bad about my baby’s dad, his whole family (who he’s never even met??) and myself & then snooped through my mom’s phone, found something I told her in private that I wanted to keep secret, and threatened to divorce her over it because he felt it meant she cared about me more than him. So I told my boyfriend that I was done going over there.

BUT it gets kind of complicated. My mom stays (no idea why) and I have 4 siblings who also live there - 2 older brothers, 2 younger sisters. My mom always tell me how much her and my siblings miss us and want to see us. I really miss them and want them to be part of my baby’s life. But I invite my mom out here ALL. THE. TIME. she never does. Usually she’ll play it out like she will and then ghosts until she wants to talk again (usually to vent about my dad). I’m really torn because on the one hand, I feel like I want to go because I want to see my siblings and mom - i miss them. But at the same time, I also really don’t because I don’t want to see or talk to my dad and I feel like if they really miss me, they will make an effort to come to me at least one time. Before the blowout, I ALWAYS came to them, even tho my boyfriend hated it and it caused issues with us, and they never do for me. So I guess they don’t really miss me that much 😔