When did your child meet your BD girlfriend?

Question

My baby is almost 9 months and his dad started coming around in his life in late June (when he was 5 months). He told me has a girlfriend and has been dating her since February 2021. I'm going to meet her Sunday. When did you feel comfortable letting her child meet your BD girlfriend? Just curious?

Answer

Well legally you don’t have a say. Although my ex and I agreed that we each want to meet the new person first and have the relationship be a year long before children get involved.

Answer

Thank you guys for your comments. He said he wanted to follow my lead because I've been the parent that's been there since the beginning and I am his primary provider. I am going to interrogate a little bit but that's because I dont trust everyone with my child. I'm pretty laid that's why me and my BD have a good co-parenting relationship. Thanks for all the opinions though.

Answer

So I met my now ex husband's children early into our relationship, like a few months in. It wasn't that I was pushing for it at all it was just a necessity thing because him and their bio mom didn't have a sitter so I volunteered to do it. My current husband and father to my kids introduced his girlfriend at the time(we were separated but he had majority custody) to the kids after being with her for like 8 months. It wasn't my place to get upset over it or for him to let me know about it or ask permission. He's an adult and if he's in the kid's lives, he is at liberty to decide when it's appropriate to introduce significant others to his kids. My husband's now ex girlfriend was a raging bitch towards me and I didn't GAF because it wasn't in front of my kids and it wasn't effecting them at all. Besides, I worked really hard to be a better person than I was before and I wasn't going to let someone undo all of that. I say meet her and talk to them both on how your child factors into their plans, what you'll do about rules set in both homes, how to follow the punishment if the rules are broken, what to do in case of an emergency and who's allowed to care for the child and remove them from school and such, etc etc. Integrate her into family life rather than interrogate her. Fold her into the dynamic and for sure exchange numbers if they will be alone with your child ever. You want to let them know that you want to co-parent as peacefully as possible and it'll be good to set up future family dates with the child present. It'll send them the signal that you're ALL loving them and working together to raise them well. You don't have to become BFFs for co-parenting to work

Answer

I think with a baby that young I’d be more lenient because they won’t remember them if they break up but if the child was like 3-4 I would probably wait around a year to make sure this is a serious relationship. I wouldn’t want new women around my child all the time

When did your child meet your BD girlfriend?

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