Not ready for a kid.

I am becoming very wish-washy, where I am In that point In my life I want a baby, I been off my birth control for 5 months, but deep down Inside I am do I really want a baby or do I wanna live my 20’s a little bit longer? 🥴 Now I am worried If I am pregnant this month and secretly hoping I am not, and I was wondering If I should wait after my period to go back on birth control or would that mess my body up even more because I really really do want a baby someday I’m just very wish washy If the time Is right now.