I need advice from an unbiased party.

Here goes:

I am really stressed! I don't want to return to work when the baby is born, but I feel like I'm making a selfish decision. I'm one of the only reliable person at the shop and I feel like me not working is leaving her high and dry. There's no way in gonna be able to work and parent the way I want to. I know life and kids don't go according to the plan usually, but I have certain things I want to do that aren't going to work if I continue to work. I can't continue to go to work early in the morning and get off late in the day. I don't want to miss out on anything. I don't want to put my baby in daycare or have someone else babysit (especially not a newborn). I want to take care of my kid. I want to breastfeed completely and there's no way I can pump at work even if I wanted to. Working the way I do has affected my relationship and I don't want it to affect my parenting. Another factor is that I feel that it's gonna make things harder for my fiance financially. He says he can handle it, but I have my doubts. I just want to be a good mom and I'm stressed that I'm not making good decisions. I have to focus on the baby, but I'm also taking into consideration how my decisions will affect others. Instinct tells me that I don't need to work considering that I am having trouble to balancing everything as is. I just don't know what I should do at this point and I'm tired of crying about it. I just want to be happy. I feel like I haven't been happy this entire pregnancy. All I've done is worry and stress. Mind you, I have a personal relationship with my boss outside of work. She also has a kid and barely takes off for anything. When people quit, she takes it hard as we are a small business and are in the room with each other for 12 hours a day. I am very depressed and don't know what to do.