At my worst state.

It pains me to miss my ex when he cheated on me numerous times and manipulated me into believing his words over his actions. I’ve caught him red handed and still hoped for change (big mistake). Here I am typing this at 2AM, crying because I miss him badly, but I shouldn’t, especially after what he put me through; emotional, mental, and physical damage. I know healing takes time just wish it wasn’t so difficult. Why do I miss someone who purposely disrespected me and ruined our relationship by his infidelities / wandering eyes? Moving on hasn’t been the easiest. I’m trying to date but he’s all I can think about. /: