My partner is boring in bed

And don't come at me for judging in silence because I've brought all the issues up with hi.. but he's very "I'm a man" "no thats gay" although he doesn't say gay because I hate the negative use. But he seems very scared to be conceived as gay and need to be manly. I guess according to his toxic friends he used to hang out with. But anyway, the sex is very "vanilla" like missionary, 5 minutes. Done. He'll finish me off but like that's all for the whole event?! What can I do?? I tried spicing things up but he just thinks like eating ass or butt play is weird and he can't do doggy style since I'm on the bigger side and his dick is on the smaller side 🙄🙄 sex is important to me. I even brought up an open relationship cause he's so funny and we bond that way like no one else in the world. But I have very important needs.