Help… advice please?

Question

I have 3 kids all under the age of 4, so I  know the comments that would come if I told anyone but other moms…
I’m depressed, anxious, I have no family where we live and very few friends. But I’m so stressed about my house. My youngest is 11 months old and he’s into everything right now. The house is a wreck. I just can’t get ahead of the mess. Nothing stays clean for more than 20 minutes. My husband works long days and when he comes home he does as much as he can with the kids/cleaning/etc. but he’s just as overwhelmed as I am. 
I just don’t know where to start. Can anyone give me tips or advice or just motivation to do anything? I guess I’m embarrassed to post a help wanted for a housecleaner on FB or anything because I’m a SAHM and…. Well… people are rude…

Answer

Girl. I’m a SAHM and have one kid (for the next week or so until my baby comes 😂) but I couldn’t do it without housecleaners. They come once a month and it’s worth every cent. Every day I’m so busy meal prepping, cooking, shopping, and entertaining and playing with my toddler that there is zero time for house cleaning. I cook and my husband does all dishes so that works for us too. There is NO shame in getting house cleaners!!!

Answer

You’re not alone. Just remember that. I think so many moms try to make it seems like everything is all fine and dandy. Like they’ve got it all together and aren’t secretly struggling with things. You as a mom feel like you need to keep it all together and pretend that the small things don’t bother you but the reality is, being a mom is hard freakin work. My suggestion is talk to someone. There’s absolutely no shame in it. I have felt overwhelmed and so stressed trying to deal with work, two kids, and keeping up with the typical every day tasks of owning a house. I’ve recently started talking to a therapist and I’m trying to work through my anxiety and stress. What I try to remind myself is that one day this won’t be our life. One day the kids will be grown. They won’t depend on us, they won’t be making a mess, or screaming, or running through the house like a bunch of crazies. And when that day comes we’re going to miss it. I know it’s hard in the moment. I know it’s hard to turn a blind eye to the mess and the laundry and the dishes piled up. But one day you’re going to have all the time in the world again. These days may feel long but the years are short. Take it one day at a time. You’ve got this momma!!!

Answer

I have no advice just solidarity 😞✊🏽

Answer

Dont listen to anyones rude comments hun. You do what you need to do okay. I hear you. Kids under 4, its hard. Nothing is clean. Ive just accepted that. I try. But in no way is it clean and perfect all the time. I have 4 & 2yr old and am 31wks with my 3rd, SAHM also. Im fkn exhausted!!! Have HG, low iron, depression (hv meds for it nw which is a life saver), seriously sometimes to stop the stress and how overwelming life is antidepressants are a huge help. Makes those low days a little less low - so much bs and negativity atm in the world gets too much. Anyway..Mama you need some rest! While your two older ones are at Kindergarten and your home with your youngest, play and NAP with your baby!! Get that extra Zzzzz's in you need to carry on so that after a week or two you will finally have a rhythm and a little more energy to do those stupid but nessacery mom stuff aka cleaning.  Girl dont sweat it, I hate having loads and loads of clean washing to sort, iron and fold and put away. Sometimes ill leave it and go through the basket as I need it. Gotta give yourself a break coz it just gets too much either wise. Its OKAY for things to be or get mess. Its totally normal. You will get to it when you get to it. Messy doesn't mean unclean. Take care of yourself. Put on some makeup and wear something that makes you feel good even if your not going anywhere. You will get there, I promise. I dont hv alot if space where I live and my kids have HEAPS of toys!! I only keep ones they actually like or play with. Anyway, instead of open toy boxes, bins however you store those things invest in some ottomans. Life changing in the aspect of keeping mess contained and clean. They cant tip everything out anymore and have to grab things out of the box one by one which means less mess. Totally worth every penny. A before and after.

Answer

One thing that really helps me with my 2 year old who is literally into EVERYTHING is to move everything out of his reach.  Even their toys, I buy smaller Tupperware storage bins, separate them into cars, kitchen toys, blocks, legos, etc and they are allowed 1 bin at a time of the kinds of toys with a ton of pieces.  They have a toy organizer that I keep their go to toys in that are easy to clean up.  When they had access to everything I could never keep up.  I also started keeping a basket in the living room.  They can only keep in the living room what they can fit in the basket at the end of the night.  Everything else goes back in the toy organizer.  He’s also my first I had to plug outlets with.  He colors on my walls with anything he can find so all writing utensils have to be way out of his reach.  The day I turned a corner and there was thick black marker all over my hallway (he did this while I was putting laundry away) I almost had a panic attack.  Thank the lord it was a dry erase marker!  I think with our littles as young as they are, you kind of have to accept a little chaos around the house will be normal until they’re older, otherwise you’ll drive yourself crazy❤️

Answer

I’m self dx ocd about my house being clean and have a 6yr old, 2yr old, and currently pregnant with baby #3. I work full time. My oldest helps- she picks up toys when she is done, makes her bed in the morning, puts her dishes on the counter, etc. The 2yr old loves to swiffer. Getting your kids involved and teaching them to clean up (somewhat) after themselves is important. My weekends I break up cleaning bathrooms, dusting, floors, kitchen. My husband also does help quite a bit- as it’s also his house & he wanted 3 kids so expectation is he helps lol. It does get very overwhelming at times (mostly because I can’t go to bed if my house is messy or dirty). I would love a housekeeper, but with soon to be 3 kids & it’s just not in our cards right now. But it’s my dream lol. There is no shame is hiring someone if you’re able & it would make you feel less stressed. Are your toys organized? Having everything organized & a home for them definitely helps in my opinion.

Help… advice please?

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