Gender disappointment

Is anyone else dealing with this? I didn’t even know this was a thing but I’m having an extreme reaction. I know this is a hot topic and I should just be grateful that this baby is healthy but all my excitement about being pregnant and being a mom vanished the moment we opened the envelope and it said it’s a girl. I feel like a horrible person and I’m so angry at myself. How has anyone gotten through this to the other side? I feel like there has to be a breaking point or method to recover and I just want to pretend these days of disappointment never happened.

Please be kind. I’m aware this is a controversial topic. But it’s a real thing and i came here for support.