Would I be a bitch for bringing this up

I've been with my husband for a long time, and it's been difficult. I love him but he's really put me through some shit. He was an alcoholic when we first met (I didn't know really, I was young), and I spent MANY weekends and Wednesdays (Happy Hour), alone at home crying because he refused to let me go with him, and refused to stay home. He would come home sometimes as late at 04:00. But we worked past that.

Then a couple of years after we got married, I found out he was having an emotional affair at work. Then I found out there was some kissing but he says it never went further than that. I asked him to transfer but he still found a way to talk and see her. That was damn difficult but we moved past that.

Now recently he's putting me through another really difficult situation with his family. He has these insane expectations of me, but everything is happening at my expense because I have expressed to him how uncomfortable and unhappy I am at the circumstances, and he's not prepared to do anything about it. In his own words "you overlooked all the shit I did and stood by me, I can do the same for my family" and it's like... But you're also asking ME to overlook the stuff they did to me and you're doing this all at my expense.

Basically everytime we discuss it, he says he understands my position but I don't understand his and then he just goes into a rant about how he wishes he were dead. Like sir, can we JUST ONCE not make it about you?!

Would I be a bitch if I had to bring up the past issues and tell him it's about time that it's about ME, not him?