Whose wrong here?

So I’m a stay at home mama. I always work 3 shifts at my hospital a schedule period. I try to at least. I have bills of my own, like my car payment, insurance, phone bill that totals 560 each month. I still have 3 children I also pay for like diapers, clothing, things kids need for the house. It’s not so much expected to work and still pay my stuff, but it’s the mentality of like okay he makes the money, he travels for work. He makes good money. He pays rent, all the house bills, his own car, all our groceries so the heavy stuff he pays But we aren’t married, I don’t wanna our pressure on him by asking for my help with my bills he does sometimes if I haven’t worked. But not Every time, you know ID also like to feel independent, have my own money and not asking my partner for money anytime I need to get stuff. Like I hope you guys can understand where I’m coming from. The problem is, it’s just me. Taking on 3 kids by myself, keeping the house afloat, cleaned, everything relies on me. I don’t get a break unless he’s home and helps which he’s gone a lot so it’s not like that happens a lot like a normal couple work schedules. I still have to take ‘em all grocery shopping, school, dr appoints, dental, my 2 year old I swear brings home so much sickness from daycare someone is always sick! So I have to call in alot OR when my partner is home and I have to work, they usually switch his schedule on him so I have to call in or try to switch it. It’s becoming too much. It genuinely feels impossibly to work. So I always get the shit end of the stick with everything it feels like. Anyway, he won’t be home the next 3 weeks. He’s back to back days in the hospital, then they have the next week in between days and he can’t drive here stay 1 night and go back it’s too much gas and time so he’ll be staying at his hotel. So then the third week the schedule is perfect. He works 3 in a row and has the rest of the week off. I also work that Friday of that week so I can finally work, and also he KNOWS I had scheduled that day for the last month and a half this isn’t a shock. I’ve been telling him. But now I’m getting told it’s his childhood friends bachelor party and he’ll be going with him for 4 freaking days which means he won’t be here to help me with the kids so I can work and I’m getting really effing tired of it. How can I work, pay my bills and be a stay at home mom 99%?! How? I know it’s his friend and it seems selfish of me if I say I didn’t want him to go but like it’s not fair to me also. I don’t get a break, I don’t get to just go for days and relax and have fun. Our kids barely see him, I barely see him. The only time he’ll have off to be home and he’s insisting on going even tho I work. He’s making me feel like an asshole for even mentioning missing that bachelor trip. I’m sorry, I don’t personally feel like I’m asking a lot here. I need help, I need their father to be here and help when he can be. He’ll be in his friends wedding as best man. Why does he need to go for 4-5 days?! After that week he’s back to being gone for work another week!!!

Whose wrong here?! Me or him? Like I’m so confused. We don’t have family to help. It’s literally all on me.