Long story short…

My ex husband and I were living with my parents because we had just moved to the state and were looking for a place. We wanted a baby and I got pregnant (not the best time but we were so happy!!). He was soo excited, had names a nursery everything ready.

One day while I was 4 months pregnant, I found out he has possibly been cheating because there were msgs with a girl.. and I lost it. At my parents house.

I just remember crying SO MUCH and running to my family siblings etc upstairs, which was a BAD move not because of them (they are amazing and respectful of us and to him) but because I shouldnt have gotten them involved! To this day I regret this so much.

All of his msgs with this girl was on his phone so my sister was upset too, holding back his phone from him. It was just chaotic, I regret it so much. I also had a very tough pregnancy and was overly emotional, not that its an excuse but.

He left the house and flew to a new state. I kept contacting him apologizing and saying lets talk, im pregnant, please. He shut me down, never talked.

I always thought this wasnt why he left as it could have been resolved.. but I see it now. Ive even contacted him to see his son, but he doesnt want to. Never saw him..

Hes on child support. I got a lawyer. Since I couldnt contact him. And in the army now.

My son and I are doing amazing! Knock on wood! We got our own place. Hes thriving.

But I cant help but feel like its all my fault. That things fell through with my ex. That my son doesnt have a father now😞

I tried SO hard to get him back and apologize and fix it all. My family barely interfered (well my sis.. but we both tried to send his phone back too).

I was in a similar situation with his family before too and they made me cry. Yet I talked it out with him and we fixed it.

I just feel so awful and blaming myself completely.😞😞 especially because he may have not even been cheating (there were deleted msgs tho. But even the few days before he was acting odd and distant and told me he didnt love me anymore..

I kept trying to apologize and just see things through with him. Have him be in his sons life. But he doesnt want to.