*Sensitive* Loss Regret?

Question

Do any other loss mama's who have had to undergo a D&C regret it at any point? Even if it wasn't really a choice? I often times find myself wishing I had taken the pill option and miscarried at home so I could have met my baby, but that's just me. I didn't have a choice though since my body wasn't recognizing the loss.

Answer

I had two D&Cs.  I have never even thought about regretting them.  My body never recognized the miscarriages, so I'm not sure when I would've finally passed them naturally.  And I had the peace of mind to know that everything was removed so I could go on to get pregnant after with no concerns (which I've done, twice).  They also genetically tested the fetuses, which let me know that both babies had trisomy 16 and were never supposed to have made it to birth.  Most trisomy 16s are miscarried by your body by week 6 and no children live with trisomy 16. I like to think that my body just wanted to hold on to these babies as long as possible and wasn't ready to give up on them.

Answer

I’m the opposite, I wish I had took the surgery rather than it naturally happening, I was 11 weeks and honestly it traumatised me so bad, I lost a lot of blood and some horrible things happened, so I wish I had took the surgery x

Answer

I do often wish that I was able to see my baby. At the same time, I don’t regret my D&C. With all the the emotional pain that I was experiencing, I didn’t want to have to go through the waiting to miscarry, and then the physical pain of it actually happening. And with the knowledge that even women who pass their babies at home sometimes have to have D&Cs to get everything out, I really didn’t want to have to experience both. Sometimes it feels like “the easy way out” but if I had to make the decision again, (please, Lord, do not put me in that situation again 🙏🏻), I’d prefer to do the D&C.

Answer

I didn’t have much of an option. I should have been 13 weeks but the baby stopped growing at 11 weeks or so. My doctor told me I could schedule for the next morning which was a Friday but if it didn’t pass by Tuesday they would need to do it anyway. He said it was my choice but was a little concerned because he didn’t want me to go septic. 
It was not as painful as I thought it was going to be. The recovery was ok. I mostly had spotting for 2 days and then a huge gush of blood on the 3rd day. That was traumatic so I couldn’t imagine if that happened and I saw a baby. 
A tiny part of me is sad that I will never get to see the baby to tell her goodbye. Mama loves u

Answer

I'm glad I got the D&C. My body was missing the miscarriage and trying to hold on. In that instance the pill would have caused a slow and long process to correct the problem. As for the D&C I was in and out within a couple hours and was able to go back to work the next day to keep things as "normal" as I could. I saved space for myself to grieve, but having everyone know I'm having a miscarriage would have been too much for me. I didn't want to go "normal" places like work and have people look at me all sad like, or tell me they are sorry every day and remind me. 
I didn't bleed the first couple days, and then had a regular period bleed for a little longer than a week and that was it. Normal period cramping and nothing out of the ordinary.

Answer

I miscarried my first pregnancy and wasn’t given any options. There was nothing my doctor (at the time I have since switched because of this incident) could do but they never brought me in to evaluate me. They pretty much told me it will pass like a super heavy period. It was not at all like that. It was unlike anything I have ever experienced and so painful. I bled very heavy for 24 days afterward. At the time I wished I had gotten the opportunity to get a procedure so I would know what was happening and not be alone. But everyone is different. I’m sorry you had to go thru that no matter what it is an awful situation.

Answer

I personally would never want to take the pill and miscarry at home instead of having a d&c. It’s much more painful and there’s a lot more bleeding.

Answer

I don’t regret the d&c. I didn’t want to have to deal with the blood and I didn’t want to go back for another ultrasound. I’m glad I did too, they found an infection and I was put on antibiotics. My body was fighting to keep mine, even thought the beam had passed. I won’t lie, it was a little isolating. I wish I could have had my partner in the recovery room. I felt very alone. At the end of the day, both options are difficult to go through, it just depends on what you think you can handle. ❤️ I’m sorry you have to go through this, it’s never easy

Answer

I think it depends on the individual. I cancelled mine last minute because it was causing me to have severe anxiety. I knew I’d regret it. I didn’t like the thought of the process and I chose to take the medication. I still have regret about having to take the medication even though those were my only options. It’s hard no matter what. I’m so sorry you had to go through this.

Sensitive Loss Regret?

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