LONG POST. TRIGGER WARNING. CHILDHOOD SA.

Some backstory-

When I was a child I use to go for sleep overs at my aunt and uncles house. Bio aunt, married to my uncle. We would go camping etc. They would always try to make it seem like we were going to do the most fun activities. However, I specifically remember some incidents with my uncle that looking back are not appropriate at all.

For example I REMEMBER him taking me on a golf cart ride when I was very young. Between the ages 5-9 (I don’t remember exactly what age) but he had me on his lap and he would move my body by my hips, back and forth. Looking back and remembering this, I know what he was doing.

Second thing I remember, him ALWAYS asking me to come sit with him. He would get upset if I didn’t and say “you don’t wanna come sit with uncle Jim?” When I would sit with him, I remember specifically him running his hands up and down my legs and getting closer and closer to my private area. I can’t for the life of me, remember if he ever touched me. It bothers me to this day because I do not know if he did or not. I feel like deep down maybe he did, but I can’t remember and my brain tries to block it out.

ALSO: side note I don’t know if it matters but my father was not in my life much as a child and I did get my period VERY early at 9 y/o.

ANYWAY. Now I am grown, married with kids. I’ve told my mother about the things I remember about this man. She still continues to see him and invite him to family functions. She claims he is an “alcoholic”. I don’t think that should be an excuse.

She gets mad at me for not coming to family functions. But she knows why I don’t want to go! HE IS ALWAYS THERE. The times he is not there, I do not mind going to family events. But I get extremely uncomfortable when he is there. I feel like she did not stick up for me as she should have as a mother. I do not want my kids near this man at all and she does not understand that.

With Christmas coming up, she is going to have it at her house and I know he will be there. She will say “well I would really appreciate it if you would come” and “it would be nice if you could actually make it this time” It sucks my kids have to miss out on fun family activities but I do not want them near him. I have two daughters and I do not want him interacting with them at all.

Am I wrong? Should I cut ties completely? She is my mother… but she tries to pressure me into family events and I am not comfortable with it.

If you got this far, thank you for taking the time to read and possibly share some advice ❤️