My boyfriend doesn’t put in effort anymore

So I’ve (21) been with my boyfriend (20) for just over a year and I do honestly love him. We met at uni and we get on so well. The last 6 months or so we don’t really do anything we just sit at his house in his bed either on tik tok or he’s just on his computer playing games and ignoring me. I understand when he has deadlines that he needs to use his computer a lot to work because that’s important but he’s still in it for over 6 hours a day even when there’s no work to be done. Like I’ll come over (because he refuses to hang out with me at my house because his computer isn’t there) and we’ll talk and chat and hang out for maybe 2-3 hours and then he’ll go in his computer for probably 5 hours.

He doesn’t make plans for us to do anything (money isn’t an issue for him and I don’t mind paying for things) I’ve asked to go to the Christmas markets with him, go I’ve skating, go for walks, go and literally do anything that isn’t just sat in his messy room.

He also refused to stock food and drink for me eventhough he knows I stay at his a lot of the time. (Which tbh I know he doesn’t have to and I buy all my own food anyway but it would just be nice ig)

I’m honestly not fussy what we do we could do literally go for a walk around the block or just go bowling like I don’t care it’s the effort I care about.

(Btw he’ll do all of this stuff with his friends)

Also he talks a lot about our future together and how he wants to get married some day but I’m scared he’ll be like this forever.

Idk am I being unreasonable? I needed a rant and second opinions on all of this. Thanks in advance :)

135 views • 0 upvotes • 3 comments

COMMENT (3)

Su

Posted at
So half the time you've been together he's been like this? Have you talked to him about it? If so and nothings changed I wouldn't stay. If you haven't then you should. You can't grow a relationship in one room and while spending that much time on a computer.

Su

Summer Shandy • Dec 24, 2022
If you've talked about it multiple times and nothing has changed then why stay? He puts no effort in for you but does for his friends and has been doing it for half the time you've been together. There's nothing to build a relationship on. If nothing changes.....then nothing changes and you end up with what you put up with.

B

B • Dec 24, 2022
I’ve spoken to him about it multiple times.