PARENTS PLEASE READ THIS.

My sister left her kids with my mom for a little while and I’ve been helping. Usually, 99% of the time they’re very well behaved.

But they’re thrown off schedule, and things probably feel weird for them.

Absolute chaos for no reason.

The last two days have absolutely exhausted me and my mom had to work so I had them by myself. I have no kids myself I have no idea what the hell I’m doing. But I learned very quickly that if get mad, and yell, they get worse. I see a lot online about how kids don’t know how to regulate their emotions yet so idk I just let them scream it out and i don’t react and when they’re done I talk about consequences calmly.

I forgot ages. 2,3, and 5.

The 5 year old kinda just watched all this like “jeez dude.”

Can’t change a pull-up without 2 year old screaming bloody murder and twisting around, trying to kick me, I learned quickly to move the poop wipes and diapers far away from kids reach.

Kids throwing food in the floor, trying to play in the electrical outlets.

Straight up acting like a-holes. Screaming, fighting, going absolutely crazy if I say they can’t electrocute themselves or burn the house down.

I’m not a mom but I know a few things. This not not their normal behavior, they’re out of their element, therefore their schedules been messed up. They miss their mom.

So I don’t yell. I correct the behavior, i make them stop even if I have to physically pick them and move them and sit infront of whatever they’re wanting to to. And they scream. I honestly don’t even react. I sit and wait until that yelling is done and I get eye level so they see that I am talking to them like I’d talk to anyone else, calmly, and I stay stuff like “if you play in the electrical out lit it can hurt you very very bad. I like you quite a bit and I don’t want you hurt, ever. So that’s just not allowed and if you continue to scream about it and choose not to listen, I will take toys, I will take TV and tablets. When you can listen and behave, you can have all that back..”

I have learned that if I get eye level with them and explain to them without yelling in their faces to stop that they completely listen to me dude. Even the two year old.

If she throws a tantrum for whatever reason, I just let her. I guess since I don’t react, she just stops and comes and lays in my lap and we talk about whatever the tantrum was about.

And with diapers and potty training, its “if you dont sit on potty or pee.” Or “if you dont lay still and let me clean your bottom.” It’s no tablet, no toys, just boredom. For everyone. We can scream all day.

They’d rather have their stuff and not scream all day so they listen. Made changing and cleaning butts much easier bc that has to be done and it was hell at first but then it was simple because of this.

Doing this stuff with them kept me from fucking crying, like it was so bad until I controlled my own anxiety, worked through being completely overwhelmed.

I got more things done, I kept the house clean and dishes done and meds given and kids clean, fed and happy. It was quiet and happy today.

Then when my mom gets home she takes over and for some reason they forget everything and go berserk again ands he’s just screaming at them, and tonight told my two year old niece to shut up. Literally screamed in her face to shut up.

Never a day in my life did my mom scream at me to shut up and I pointed that out to her and also kinda went off. Like mom you just screamed at a baby to shut up, what the HELL is wrong with you?

“They don’t act like this. They know better. They have more control than this and they know it and you just coddle them.” and she threatened to spank the 3 year old so i picked her up and I was like mom. You can go, go to bed. I got this. Just go. I said “they are just toddlers and they are off schedule and they miss their mom but thanks a lot for the mercy you just gave.”

May be im fucking soft dude. But oh guess what, I got kids fed and bathed and happy in bed without ANY fits, without ANY issue. No screaming no fighting.

I hope… I hope she listens to me. I don’t know who’s right or wrong but if they were my kids she screamed at to shut up id fucking lose it, I don’t know why it made me so fucking mad. It made me feel like I needed to protect them from her and i felt so weird. Am I overreacting? I was going to tell my sister but idk if I’m overreacting.

I remember my mom being patient with us. Its like shes completely last her patience with her grandkids. And i get that she had to work all day, and maybe that’s why, but in what world does someone scream at a 2 year old to shut up.

I tried to tell her how I get them behaved but that’s some coddling spoiling ass shit to her. Coddling would be like “oh you just whacked your sister with a toy? Oh that’s because you’re just a baby.”

When that’s not what i do.

Am I wrong? Give opinions especially if I should tell my sister.

I am super overwhelmed trying to figure out how to… honestly trying to figure out how tf my sister does this. and just trying my best and I feel like my mom is being too damn harsh, and she makes me feel like I’m being too soft.