Am I wrong here?

Question

Long story short, my husband got a new job. A job he’s always wanted to do.
We had many discussions about it before he took it. About the hours being very demanding and can change at any minute. How he might be busy for days on end with little to no sleep. My concerns for how this would affect family life, how he would be able to function or juggle things because he does not do well without sleep.
Needless to say he took the job. I want to preface by saying, I never told him not to take the job. Just wanted him to be fully aware of the challenges it may pose so that he was making an informed decision.
Well he’s been telling me how exhausted he is. How he’s spent and how much work it is. I didn’t really say much to that, and now he’s mad at me for not being “empathetic” towards him.
Am I wrong here? I’m not being a B or anything, just not really babying him about all these things he knew would happen. Opinions?

Answer

Just because he knew he would be exhausted doesn’t mean his exhaustion should be invalidated imo

Answer

It’s not “babying your partner” to be sympathetic to their struggles. 
I work two jobs right now and it’s exhausting. I knew it would be but that doesn’t change that it’s hard

Answer

Sounds like you're having an "I told you so" moment, which honestly isn't helpful. It's OK to have a little bit of empathy towards him. He's allowed to complain about his workday or how tired he is, ￼just the same as anyone else. It's pretty much par for the course with most jobs. ￼A little commiseration would go a long way, but acting like "I told you" so isn't going to do anything good for anyone. ￼

Answer

You both knew it would be challenging. You both knew it would be exhausting for him. And while that can be frustrating on your end, he should still be allowed to come home and say "Ugh, today has been really rough. I'm exhausted" without being ignored because he should have know he would be exhausted.
Talk to him. Listen to his day.
I bet you would want the same if you were him.

Answer

My husband took a draining job I didn’t want him to take and I’m not overly sympathetic either. If they wanted this lifestyle and chose it, then I don’t want to sit and listen to nonstop complaining about it. I’d just let it go for now because if you say anything it’ll probably just start an argument when he’s tired. He will probably eventually get used to it.

Answer

Honestly… I get it. Caregiver fatigue. It’s hard to be sympathetic all the time. When this happens to me I have to take a deep breath and remember all the annoying and dramatic bullshit I have done and my husband has “put up with” and it helps a lot. It always sucks when the shoe is on the other foot and none of us are perfect. Wishing you patience and understanding. When that fails have a glass of wine and throat punch him in your mind 🤷🏼‍♀️

Answer

I personally feel like a grown man who you have a very serious conversation with about how strenuous it is going to be beforehand knew exactly what he was getting himself into and doesn't need coddling. It sounds like even after you laid out all the cons it would cause for your family he didn't care and went for it anyway so now he's looking for sympathy when he made this decision for himself and didn't take the family into consideration. I personally would just be like "I'm sorry about that, remember how we talked about how hard this would be? There are always other options that would be better for everyone but this is what you wanted." 🤷🏻‍♀️ That's just how I feel about it.

Answer

I can't relate. I don't care how aware my husband is of his stressful job. I'll "baby" the shit out of my man ❤️

Am I wrong here?

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