How can i slowly let someone in and bring my guard down?

Question

After my ex husband and I split I saw a version of him that I never expected. It’s made me very guarded with people in general but especially dating. I don’t let people get to close because the one person I didn’t expect to become a monster became one. I have my tight circle that I truly trust with my life but when It comes to dating, I’m guarded. Looking for advice how I can slowly allow the “right ones” in. Thanks!

Answer

You're still in the healing process, it's ok to go through these emotions, give yourself time.
Try and get therapy. Be cognitive, learn where you played yourself, where you made excuses, where you lied to yourself, where you were the one accountable. 
This is not to bring you shame, but to be wiser and turn red flags into deal breakers.
Finally, write down how you know you are better without this person. He was unhealthy for you, he was not good to you, so really think of how much better you will be and feel without him.

How can i slowly let someone in and bring my guard down?

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