What's it like to love your partner?

Hello,

I have a question...for those of you who have a weird relationship with love, how does it feel to love your partner ?

For context, I don't have a solid relationship with love. I grew up with emotionally distant parents where we never told each other that we love each other and that "it went without saying". However, it definitely did not go without saying, because it feels weird to say I love my family to this day. Like i know that I care about them and that I'll always help out if needed, but do I LOVE them? I dunno. Now I'm married and I don't really know what love is supposed to feel like. Granted, he and I have been through a super long rough patch but our relationship has been pretty calm for a month or two and I'm just not really sure how I feel about our relationship. Aside from the rough patch, he really is my best friend. We're weird/goofy together, I always want to tell him my good news, he always wants to talk to me, and we just get a long super well. But there are times, like once or twice a week, where I feel like if I left this marriage, I would be okay in the long run, but I also know how emotionally distant and hyper independent I can be. That said, I'm not really sure if I should let this relationship go or if I just stick it out, if I'll feel the love again.

I'm not asking for advice or what I should do. I'm just wondering if there are people out there that are kind of like me? Because I just don't know if love really is this whimsical, magical feeling that just takes away all the dysfunction from the past or if its something you have to learn how to do with someone else?

Thank you, I hope this isn't too confusing ❤️