How do cope with losing someone you had an connection with?

Lost story short. I recently had our 3rd baby. However i have lost all family and friends as theyre toxic treated me so Badly etc so cut them off. However my midwife has been amazing was there when I had nobody else was always so kind caring and supportive. She felt more like a friend than a professional. And I cannot stop crying that I'll never get to see her again i know it sounds pathetic :( anyone been through something similar? Sge said i can call anytime but I feel silly for wasting her time... it just hurts alot that i wont see her anymore unfortunatelyx