Heartbroken

So me and my husband has had ups and downs over the years. Well I had surgery two days ago to have my gallbladder removed. I told him I was worried about having it done at that time because him and my oldest son got in to a verbal fight both the night before and morning of my surgery and I was afraid he would be mean to me afterwards. Well maybe I’m just expecting to much for a man because all he’s done is watched football and played on his phone. My teenage daughter has been the one helping me. Then he got mad at me because I asked for help getting into the shower and he told me he was done me going to leave me. I’m so tired and sore and this is the way he treats me when I need help the most. We have been married for 16yrs and this same man will apologize to me days from now but if I don’t accept the apology he will make me feel bad for it and it will start all over again. Am I just selfish that I wish I had a spouse who loved me enough to care for me after having surgery and who will ask me how he can help. It’s like he hates me if Im sick or hurt and can’t do what I normally do. He tells me if anything major ever happened he would take care of me but this just seems like this proves the opposite. He even started drama on FB stating it was time for a change… meaning he’s leaving me. This surgery had been exhausting and sore on me then this is added to it. I guess I have unrealistic expectations that a man could be caring the way I have been.