Midwife for over 35

I'm 39 and I dont want to have my baby in a hospital. I had my first two at the hospital and I hated the whole thing both times. I didn't have pain meds or epiduras. When the nurses would check me it hurt so bad. One nurse told me to be quiet(I had pitocin and was having a rough contraction) The actual births were fine. I didnt tear or have episiotomies. I'm just wondering if I'll be forced to use a regular OB and go to whichever hospital they contract with because of my age.