Im being selfish

Here’s a lil recap. My husband and I been together since we were 15, we both are now 31. So we didn’t do the whole going out and having some drinks and going to a bar type of thing. I’m not getting any older and I want to start going out with him dancing drinking. We have before but it’s once in a great while since he’s not that type of person that likes to go out like that. We are not getting any younger and I want to enjoy life and have fun. I always get invited by my family and bestfriend to go to a bar and have a drink and I always say no. Because I know how my husband thinks about me going out anywhere. I’m starting to resent him and I shouldn’t and im being selfish. But I want to live a little I want to go out I want to have a Instagram and TikTok. I want to be able to take selfies. I’m not trying to seek attention but I want yo be more involved in today’s society. When I feel good I want to be able to take a picture of myself and not be questioned. I know I’m being selfish but I just wanted to live a little. Thanks for listening me.