I miscarried, sister pregnant 2x and doesn’t want them

Please if you have ever been in a similar situation or understand how I feel, I would love some thoughts and guidance. I hate that I feel sour towards my sisters pregnancy. First pregnancy she didn’t know she was, aborted at 7 months because she was ashamed of the baby daddy two years ago and lied to us. We rekindled our relationship…. I just miscarried in November….. and I find out today she is 18 weeks pregnant and didn’t even know it until now! This time she is going to keep it although this baby daddy doesn’t want it. I hate to say it but I am a little jealous. Why is it that she, someone who doesn’t even want a baby, gets and keeps her pregnancy? Meanwhile, my fiancé and I can’t wait to have one and can’t wait to get pregnant again! Why do I feel upset? How can I be better?

Those who have already read this clearly misunderstood me. I am not trying to wish harm on her pregnancy by no means. And I remind you, termination at any stage is allowed in Colorado, which is where she went. As I mentioned she does not even want this one either. So it seems okay for me to be upset that someone who doesn’t even want a baby can have one but I had my miscarriage.