Baby shower dilemma

Venting :

Just needed someone to vent. I’m having baby shower dilemma. With my boyfriends mom & I just don’t know what to do I’m trying to go for a very simple pink suttle baby shower nothing crazy but everything she has sent me has been like super fancy super extra and she’s just been making all these comments like oh that’s my first grandbaby I’m do what I want . And I’m just like yes and your son first daughter mind you this isn’t my first kid … just my boyfriend and his family my daughter is going to be the new baby of the family I know everyone is over the moon, but it’s just like how do you tell her no everything has an input .. she’s upset because we’re buying a NUNA because we’re not waiting for the baby shower mind you I’m having an early baby shower because I am having heart problems and I have gotten pre eclampsia with my other kids I’m considered high risk … so I’m doing baby shower at 28 weeks to be comfortable and not overly pregnant and in a safe space just in case … I just needed to vent it’s been so hard to say no when I don’t want to come off as rude or harsh or not appreciative of what they do for me …. It’s just so many things