i’ve been in this relationship almost 3 years (21F 31M). we don’t live together. we both pay our own bills. we never give each other money. he does pay most of the time when we go out to eat. back in 2020 i got unemployment. about 22k. i haven’t spent any of it except to pay off debt. his birthday is coming up and i’m taking him to new york. i already paid for plane tickets ($400) and room ($900) and gifts ($400). well he’s begging for me to give him $1000 of unemployment for a shopping spree. i’ve told him time and time again i’m saving that money for something important. school, debt, a house, emergency, investing. i haven’t even spent any of it on myself. i don’t come from money so that’s a lot to me and i want to be smart about it. he’s making me out to be a bad girlfriend because i said “i’ll think about it”. he says as my man it shouldn’t even be a question. i know when you wanna spend your life with someone your money is their money. but shopping?? if he needed it for bills or something then of course because i feel like it’s stupid for shopping. am i really selfish and a bad gf cause i don’t wanna give him money?