He cheated & i feel free

When I went to see my doctor a couple weeks before my due date my std test was positive. I asked my ex fiancé if he cheated he said no so I’m thinking mine is false positive . He got tested (urine) and his was negative. So he accused me of cheating. I never once cheated on him. So believing him I’m asking the dr how .

My dr said you couldn’t get it from a toilet seat And if I never cheated then it can be that it hasn’t shown up in my system yet, or that his is a false negative and that the most accurate would’ve been a swab for him. But Because given I have it and me and him had unprotected sex he has it . Anyways We both got cured of it so we couldn’t test again . But for 3 months he denied cheating had me going crazy . So crazy I’m loosing sleep , I’m up googling everything about stds, I’m lurking his ex women pages see if he liked photos, I’m going through his phone , etc , he’s noticing I’m not keeping up with myself . Not wanting to get out of bed but he blamed that on having a newborn /postpartum depression. So I tell him I’m starting to mentally leave this relationship and that If he didn’t cheat I can’t get over not knowing how I got the std when I didn’t cheat either so I gave him the ring and called off the engagement. this was mid may. He still says he didn’t cheat and if I leave he understands. then June 1st I see a post about it being the second half of the year motivation quote so I sign myself up for therapy online and he walks in on the end of my second therapy session. So we talk .

That day he admit to cheating 3 days before my std test . We hadn’t had sex a week before that. He says he was in the car in the driveway listening to music planning his week out and realized he didn’t have a BLK so he drove to the gas station and there was a woman there who asked him if he could walk her home around the corner . She was hiding from her boyfriend. He walked her to her apartment complex and claims she offered him head to pay him for walking her and he accepted it . Outside by a gate under some trees .

I asked him more about what happened that night when he came in . He told me he came in took a shower and I almost caught on cuz I knocked on the bathroom door asked why he was showering at 2:30 am he said because he just was and I let it go . But he felt bad cuz the next morning we had sex .

The reason he didn’t tell me was because how embarrassing the story was that he had such a moment of weakness he got head from a random woman . He doesn’t know her name or the exact apt number . That’s why he was mad after my test results because he couldn’t confront her . I asked him if he had sex with the woman he said no that he couldn’t finish with her either because he “thought about me being home pregnant” told the girl stop and she asked is he sure then she left. I told him I couldn’t imagine him just getting head from someone in front of an apartment complex in the open . Says nobody was on the road and it was dark . I Asked if he said he walked because he was using my car that day and doesn’t want to say he got head in my car . He says he walked he because the girl wanted to walk and it would’ve been disrespectful having her in the car but it was disrespectful cheating too .

I don’t believe his story .

I feel he paid a prostitute , I feel he had sex with her not just head . In my car . He wasn’t going to tell me esp if there wasn’t the positive and there’s no way I would’ve find out if it really was with a random not like she’d know how to tell me But I feel soooo free knowing the truth . I can’t explain it , I’m still in therapy ofc . But idk I just wanted to share my story . Trust your gut even if there’s no proof . As of right now we still live together, haven’t had sex even though we had sex before he told the truth . we have a lot to sort out . We’ve been together 3 years and now have a baby . My therapist messaged me saying if I can trust he will tell the truth in the future and I feel I can forgive him and he will fix it stay but if not then leave . The coparenting can always be sorted later .

@queen I feel free because I was about to marry this man and now I no longer have to stay up thinking . One time is good enough for me idc how many times he cheated . Im done with him .