Lost backbone

Husband and I are in the very beginning stages of separation and divorce. We have twins who will be starting their senior year in the fall and we decided it’d be best if we live together until they graduate. This all is happening extremely fast and I have been so depressed and anxious that I feel like I can’t move. I express this to my mother but it’s like talking to a brick wall, she thinks I can magically just stop feeling like this. Today I had an emergency and asked my husband for money to help, he told me to ask my mother. The thing is, he drive my car to work this morning and won’t be home until 10pm. Yesterday he drove my car but came home in between shifts and I told him to leave my car here. Today he decided to stay at work so I can’t get my car back from him. My car is much newer than his and he prefers it to his. I don’t think this is fair and it is making me sick knowing he has so much power and I feel power less. This man has emotionally abused me to the point of total codependency and I want to be better and to be stronger but I feel like I can’t. My mother told me to take my car keys back from him but I don’t have the heart to. I just don’t have the guts to treat people how they treat me also he is the only one who works so I don’t want to upset him and he decide to do something spiteful to me. Yesterday I went grocery shopping and he gave me a strict list, when I asked why it was necessary and he told me that it was because it’s his money. When I tried asking another question he just hung up on me. I don’t know what to do and it’s causing me so much distress feeling like I am stuck. I don’t know what to do and I know other women have been in my situation I just don’t know how to find the strength to get out.