Am I doing something wrong?

Question

My boyfriend acts like he’s really into me being on top, but he for some reason does not get hard with me on top. If he does, it comes and goes right away. Is it something I’m doing? Or something I’m not doing? Seems like he can only stay hard if he’s on top but sometimes, I want to be in control. Any tips?

Answer

When he’s in control he knows what he needs to get off. How fast, how deep, not stopping the momentum, when he’s getting close, he’s in control of everything and knows what works. When you are in control you go at your own pace. May stop if your legs get tired or need a breather and get tired , might break the momentum and he’s gotta start all over again and goes soft because it’s not a constant movement like he’s used to. Maybe he slips out. I know you are over thinking it, that I’m doing something wrong. He’s not attracted to me. Etc. let’s just be honest you know what works for you. Probably get off faster on your own than when someone else tries to do it. Right?  Same thing. When he does it himself, he knows exactly what he has to do to get off. Ask him what can I do to make this a better experience for you?  Tighten the vaginal muscles? Talk dirty? Slap your face or hand around the throat or pull your hair or degrade you. Ask him what works for him. Maybe you slip out maybe a more grinding and rocking that hopping up and down like a frog if he’s smaller or slips out. Try a modification of reversed cowgirl. Stand at the end of the bed with your back to him and have him scooch down underneath you and he can get you from underneath too. Easier on your legs and knees. And if you get tired he can take over.

Am I doing something wrong?

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