Are we not parenting anymore?

Question

So, I have a 2 year and 3 month old baby boy. He is very very tall for his age and is going to be a very tall lad. I seem to be having issues in groups and nursery as people think he’s older than what he is and expect more from him? On a number of occasions my boy has been subject to hits and scratches off other children. Now I’m not stupid I know kids learn and there exploring with the hands and can sometimes lash out, but now my boy seems to be getting targeted at other groups we go and other kids smacking him? When I point out what the other child has done to their parent I seem to be getting brushed off? Like no one seems to think it’s mean to hit other children? I’ve taught my baby that we don’t hit and we play nice, and he plays so lovely and shares his toys only to be met with slaps and scratches? And tbh.. I’m at the end of my tether? So my question is…
- Have people stopped teaching their children to be kind and actually parent their children? Or is it a free for all? 
- is anyone else having issues with their children being tall and people expecting more from them? 
Because quite honestly my heart is breaking for him, and I’m now having to tell my baby boy.. that if a child hits you.. then you hit them back harder… a phrase I never thought I would have to tell my child.. but I’m also not raising no punch bag for anyone in this world.. 
Any answers… tips.. anything really to help a mother at the end of her tether with a heart that’s breaking 🥺

Answer

My nephew is extremely tall for his age - his mom (my SIL) is 6’2”, and his dad is 6’6”. They’re extremely tall. He was wearing 5 and 6T clothes at just two years old. He would have older kids approach him trying to get him to play their rough and tumble games, and he eventually got the hang of how to work with them at a really young age. They had issues with some rude and mean older kids, so my SIL would just avoid them. She never had to tell my nephew that he needs to hit back or retaliate. They’d just avoid the park during certain days, or not participate in play groups if a mean child would be there. Obviously you can’t always predict what will happen. But telling a sweet and gentle child to physically retaliate is not the best solution.

Answer

Telling your child that is already larger to hit back harder is a bad idea and in my view just as bad of parenting. Teach him to use proper methods and as they are all young remove himself if need be. It's not being a punching bag....they are all very little still. Sounds like you need to find places to play for now and find other kids. My oldest is very very very tall for her age like literally off the growth chart they use. Between her height and her vocabulary many think she is older and always has. I have never had every single kid she plays with at any age behave like that. If she had issues we taught her what she should do and if it didnt work she knew to come get me and I'd help or we would figure it out. But no I'd never tell my kid to hit back and make sure its harder.

Answer

I share your frustration when it comes to other parents ignoring hitting.. if I see my daughter get hit by anyone when we are out I'll tell the other kid off instinctively. Not like a full on but "no, no hitting!" in a low, stern voice..My daughter is also super sociable.and.likes sharing so when others dont do it back to her, I sometimes lie and explain to her "not everyone is as good as sharing as you, youre a bit.older (even though she's younger) and they learn better soon" cus i feel.the need to explain to her why they.dont get held to the same standard as her.. i don't think you should tell him to hit.back,.say to.come and.find you instead

Are we not parenting anymore?

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