Husband won't listen to my concerns about the relationship would it be pathetic to write him a letter?

My husband won't have a sit down conversation with me about how I feel that he's being abusive and that he needs to change that. He won't go back to couples therapy because he says I "embarrassed him". He won't listen to me. Would it be pathetic if I wrote a letter to get all my thoughts out to him interrupted? Or do I just give up ? I'm not the type to just give up I'm trying here.