I am a teacher and my best friend is a teacher. She recently accepted a new job in a different district. Since her mom died she has changed drastically. She wasn’t close with her mom and she always felt like the least favorite of her 3 siblings. She has been snippy, rude, and slightly narcissistic with her actions and words.

She gets angry when she’s by herself teaching inclusion students. She gets angry at me when I have a nice packed lunch. I go to my doctor appointments and she says “It must be nice to go to those. I’ve had to cancel mine.” She doesn’t have to cancel them. We work in a great school where we can attend our appointments. She always keeps her hail and nail appointments every 2 weeks. She gets upset when she has to do resource time with certain students. She is paranoid and thinks that admin have cameras or microphones listening in on her room. She says she trusts me and a few others, but then refuses to talk to us when she’s upset; because she can’t trust anyone. She complains about not having a team or help with her duties, but she DOES have a team. She complains that no one wants to be with her or next to her during meetings but we do sit with her. She gets upset if I don’t call her every day but ignores my texts. I have a life outside of work and her. She gets upset about her home life but she’s allowing certain things to go on in her home. She allows her children to walk all over her and speak to her like a dog. She doesn’t really discipline them and never has. They are teenagers now. She cries when she’s critiqued in private by the principal. She cries when things don’t go her way. She likes to one up me every chance she gets, even if it’s not true. I don’t understand. This all started when her mom died in March. Being her friend is draining my mental health and there’s a lot more happening; it’s just too much to type out.

Advice? Opinions?

Edit: Yes, I know she’s grieving but that doesn’t give her the right to take it out on students and coworkers at work. People have tried to be her friend and it doesn’t end well. All staff and a lot of students signed cards for her and she ripped them up. She became angry when there wasn’t any money or gift cards in it. She thinks other teachers are spying on her and telling admin. She has become very paranoid about certain things. She has crossed FERPA laws this year. I’ve been her best friend for 12 years. She doesn’t have the right to be rude to me or others at work, outside of work, anywhere. She doesn’t have the right to turn people into verbal punching bags. @ Casey: I understand people grieve differently, but that doesn’t give her the right to create a hostile work environment or blow up me when I’m home with my family or doing family activities.