Birthday Blues

Does anyone else get Birthday Blues ?

I’m 30, about to be 31 and I’m reflecting on where I’d hoped to be in life by now and I’m disappointed as to where I am. I’m happy my boyfriend moved it but I hoped I’d have a baby or be pregnant and I absolutely hate my job as well and after searching endlessly online there isn’t anything which would be right for me. Everything combined plus the fact my family are abusive and toxic ( mum, dad and sister ) just makes me sad. I want to be happy around this time of year and can’t be !! I wish I had the courage to quit and get a job elsewhere but ive been looking for years and cant find anything.