Abuse from grandma…

My kiddos ages 13 and 9 have recently (Before Christmas) decided they no longer want to go to their grandmas house. (my MIL)

Back story of WHY they made this decision, with my help. One day I was coming back from the next town over to pick up my kids from her house. I called to let them know I’d be no more than 5 minutes. I can hear my mother in law cussing out my 13 year old daughter. My daughter is begging her to just leave her alone, and her aunt (lives there with her 3 boys) says “She wasn’t talking to you mom. Leave her alone! Geez” This made me get upset. I said to my kids to just get their things gathered because they won’t be back. Not how she was speaking to her. I hear the grandma say “Yeah, listen to your mom. Y’all aren’t fucking welcome back bitch!” I’ve had personal issues with her in the past, so I thought she was talking to me…. No she was calling my daughter a bitch!

Fast forward, my husband said his mom painted a different picture and was saying our daughter wouldn’t stop “running her mouth” and when she told her to be quiet she got louder and wouldn’t listen. I told him how his sister said she wasn’t even doing anything wrong that their mom was in a mood and started with our daughter. It was handled….

Christmas comes around. My daughter doesn’t want to go over because during that argument her grandma told them she didn’t buy them shit for Christmas because they wasn’t worth it this year. This has me HOT and I didn’t want to go over there either, nor did I want to give them the gifts we bought everyone. But he insisted that we come because she wanted to apologize to our kids and give their gifts. We went and she gaslighted my daughter and love bombed her in the other room away from us. 🙄 She knew i was pissed about it all and wouldn’t come out the room. She literally hid until we left. My kids only got a small gift, while the other grandkids got MANY expensive gifts from their grandma. This hurt my kids and they didn’t go back over.

This part needs squeezed in and I didn’t know where to put it, but it’s relevant to the rest of the story! My son who is 9 got a message from one of the nephews whom lives with the grandma begging him to play a game. When he said he couldn’t because he was doing homework, the nephew went crazy! Called him stupid, autistic, said no one loved him. Even went as far as to threaten his life and mine. He’s only 10, so this had me sick! Like you’re physically threatening my kid over not playing a game? Tearing his ass down over not playing a game? His grandma…. Laughed! She fucking laughed!

Last week my daughter got in trouble at school, and we needed to go about an hour out of town. I said “I may take yall to your grandmas house until we get back.” She freaked out! Crying hysterically, yelling about not wanting to go over to that crazy woman’s house. I was only informed of the argument they had at the time, so these emotions shown didn’t match. I asked my big sister to talk to her this weekend…. We found out she’s been abusing my daughter for years! Slapping her across the face, verbally abusing her, calling her names like a whore, slut, calling her fast because she wore a padded bra…. Hitting her when she got frustrated, pushing her, getting in her face fist drawn, mentally tearing her down…wouldn’t let her call me on HER OWN PHONE, every time she’d talk to a friend she’d say those friends was going to rape and murder my daughter. She constantly was yelling at my son saying he’s faking his heart condition, and how gross he was to fake it. It’s a very documented condition! He also has lung issues that she would yell at his sister for. Why? She has no idea! She would just go nuts on her about it. It’s wild what came out. I’m PISSED! I want to go out my hands on this woman, but I know it’s not wise!

I’m really trying to remain calm. I don’t know weather pressing charges is wise since I don’t have physical evidence of the abuse. Besides dropping contact, is there anything else you’d do?