Mamas help me outttttt

Im so tired and dont know what to do ...

My son is 5 and he is the sweetest boy, but we've been having some problems. Its that when we go anywhere he doesnt listen to what i have yo say to him (ex: dont run, come here, dont do that or this) he just avoids me or makes himself as if he cant hear me .. and the worst part is that if we go somewhere where there are kids... he makes weird sounds just to attract their attention OR WORSE he bites,pushes, hits.

And i tried every single thing....

i talked with him gently.. i tried punishing him, i tried empathy i tried giving him consequences to his actions... nothing seems to work.

And he started pre school this year, he has this friend who he gets in trouble with alot but nothing major. Just cant seem to share toys and ideas etc. but everytime he comes home he tells me how that friend of his hits him and says bad words. And when i give a call to his homeroom teacher she says that didnt happen and its mostly the ooposite where my son is more aggressive.

What should i do ?

Should i be more calm and solve it gently but with limits?

Or should i be more firm ?

I dont want my son to hurt anyone and also indont want him to be someone who no one loves ... am so torn....

He is not a big trouble maker i promise.. he plays very well in playgrounds and other places except family gatherings and school.