Anxiety

I don't know what's wrong with me. I've wanted to drive for 15 years, i have a car now and I'm too anxious to drive it. I don't want to go anywhere, my kids are off school and we havent gone anywhere. I want to stay in my house,i took them to the park and my sons scooter broke, so we went back home. I felt awkward the entire time, the suns out and I'm still fat and uncomfortable. Stressed. I love my kids, i want a break just a day to myself. It wont happen. My kids have additional needs, no one has been trained to take care of them except my mum. My mum won't take take them unless i have an appointment or something. I'm in the middle of court proceedings with their dad and it's been almost 5 years. He can't have physical contact with them. I thought we were closer to the end,but he still hasn't bothered to recieve training to care for our children so it's set us back. I feel like a failure, my kids deserve more and i can't even take them outside for a few hours.