Some polite ways to tell nosy relatives to mind their business, please?

Question

My in-laws (MIL, aunts, grandmother) are becoming increasingly more and more nosy and opinionated about how we should have a baby asap. What are some *polite* ways I could keep them at bay? Hubby's grandmother's 80th birthday party is coming up and ALL of those nosy women will be there. Plus I've gained a few pounds since the last time we met them, so I'm dreading the inevitable "Oh! So do you finally have some good news?" 😒 (We have only been TTC for 3 months, but it is still stressful enough without these insensitive interactions.)

I'd appreciate some *polite* things to say to them, not things like "I'd just tell them to shut up and mind their business" haha. These women are in their 50s to 80s and set in their ways. Sigh.

Answer

Women... lol... gotta love their enthusiasm. I think they are concerned about their age and want a baby asap. Just let them know that they don't "sell" babies this month but u will try to get one next month lol... I always joke with mine and the more sarcastic I am the more annoyed they get (in a good way).

Answer

I'd pay their belly and say "do you??" But that's not polite 😂😂

Answer

Ugh. Sounds like mother in law. Not only does she tell us when we should have them (because she's "not waiting 5 YEARS for grandkids!!!!") but she also tells us what their names should be (named after my husband or HER, natch) and what religion they should be raised in. My husband has politely and calmly told her time after time that this is between me and him. But she's relentless. I used to crack jokes in response because it made me feel so uncomfortable, but my approach has changed. I'm polite but direct. "I'm sorry, MIL, but that's between myself and my husband." That's the ONLY thing I say to her when she gets started.

Her: you two better get started, you're not getting any younger!

Me: I'm sorry, but that's between me and my husband.

Her: Well I'm not waiting 5 years for grandkids!!!

Me: I'm sorry but that's between me and my husband.

Her: Will you name them after family members? What about biblical names?

Me: I'M SORRY, that is between me and my husband. (Even though I KNOW she already has been told the answer to this. Many times).

One of these days, maybe she'll get the point.

Answer

I would just say that you and your hubby are enjoying each other's company right now and enjoying life. But should a little one come along, they will be the very first to know! That you will make a call ASAP and tell them the fab news. ( this way they will hopefully stop asking as you said you would call to tell them. )and also tell them that you aren't rushing. ( which you might be but don't let them know there is a problem because they will drive you nuts with advice)

Answer

I usually just tell people that we're not ready yet... Reasons I've given have been 
1. We want to have $x amount in savings before having a child.
2. I want to lose weight and be in the best physical shape before getting pregnant
3. This is very personal, but when the time comes we'll let you know.

They will ALL respond by telling you that you will never be financially prepared, it's selfish to want to be in good shape, and it's their business because they're family... But then they'll stop asking.

Answer

Sounds like my in laws. Luckily I could just ignore their phone calls and text messages lol. But I would politely tell them that you will let them know when you become pregnant so to please stop asking.

Answer

I'd level with them, and say that's not something that you are comfortable discussing (or whatever your actual objection may be).  If they bring it up again, then tell them you've already spoken to them about this, and you're not doing it again.  If you tell them you don't want to discuss and they keep bothering you, it doesn't matter how "set in their ways" they are, they're the ones being rude.*

*unless grandma or anyone else has a genuine memory issue.

Answer

I got all the questions to stop by telling people that we are waiting for a specific life goal. A house with a yard was mine. (Make sure your life goal is one that others can see too. They will never know when you have enough money in your savings so they will keep asking) and I told them as soon as we get our house, we plan to try and make babies. 
So we've had our house with a yard for a little while now and no one has asked us about it. I think they all assume we are trying. 
Now maybe since you are currently trying, maybe tell them, "oh, we wanted to wait till fall so that I can enjoy the summer as a last hoorah." And then they won't ask you till at least after that. And won't they be in shock when you fall preggo before then!

Answer

When I get that question from my family. Some of which don't know I am not having children.

I tell them to mind their own business. Politely of course until they piss me off. Then I tell them to eff off since it is my life not theirs and if I want kids I will have them when I want to have them.

Just tell them straight up. "If there was, we would tell you. Until then please stop being so nosy."

Answer

My SIL is telling people that they aren't having kids - for this very reason - so that they don't get harassed about reproducing. My MIL is very upset about it... Little does she know she'll be very surprised one day!
I had a fit at my own mother when she asked me at 26ish a year after I was married and my MIL was in the room so heard every word. I said "don't ask me that, I'll have kids when I want to so don't bother asking again". She never asked again. 
My dad did say to me a year or so later "I'll only ask this once: you want kids one day right?" And I told him yes, one day.

Some polite ways to tell nosy relatives to mind their business, please?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products