Well. My spirits are so low lately. I'm 5dpo and we dtd all thruout my window except the last 2 days. I wanted to conceive so bad. But I also realize my body is not where I want it to be to carry a child. Between falling in love, getting surgery, losing motivation and getting a little depressed/anxious, and being stressed out... I allowed to let myself go and gained 30 lbs. before all this I was in the gym religiously and following a strict diet to the T. I was so proud of myself and my confidence was thru the roof. I felt on top of the world. Now I feel buried under it. I'm a whole different person now and I don't even know who I am anymore sometimes. I feel numb, anxious, depressed, borderline emotionless. And I just got married. I wasn't exciting either. Civil union and still too many people -family and friends wanting to get together. I don't feel like we had any alone time and because we're both military and in different places it's hard to see each other. We've both gone broke spending money on flights and hotels and car rentals just to see each other.