dying my hair

my babys dad was being so protective he said he wasnt letting me dye my hair AT ALL until the baby was born but thankfully I convinced him by telling him im going to dye my hair with a hair dye that has no ammonia so Im thinking either dark brown or black what do you ladies think is better ? I used to be light skin but now Im a bit darker because of the sun . I always go from black to brown to blonde just that I hate how my boyfriends family always criticizes me , they always make comments like 

" you looked better with red hair " 

" you look like ( and compare me to someone from dragon ball z ) or say " she looks ugly " or " she looks uglier than ever " it really hurts my feelings because it makes me feel insecure about myself and im trying to grow my hair out . I used to have it long and thick all the way down to my butt and now Its a little past my shoulders . I dont see why im " ugly " when I dye my hair my natural color which is a very dark brown close to black . 

im just going to do what makes me happy and not listen to what they have to say . 

should I go dark brown or black ? 

im thinking black but I dont know im scared it might not go with me