Overwhelmed and for the first time supported..

I've got PTSD. Most of the time I cope pretty well but the past couple weeks have been pretty hard. I've been dealing with some legal stuff-my license was suspended on an unpaid speeding ticket and snowballed into several non appearances, etc. For the most part thats been going pretty smoothly but my last appearance didn't go very well- I've been missing a lot of work for court and ovarian cysts, something I've had problems with for a long time and haven't brrn able to find a helpful doctor and a medication to help. I don't have much of a relationship with any of my family-my father is/was an abusive alcoholic and drug addict, my mother took her life when I was 9, I have a few really good friends but they don't live close so I'm pretty much left with my bf as my only support system. But lately, I've been so overwhelmed, court and work have been stressful enough but my dad tried to call me on Easter, my phone was dead all weekend so I didn't get it until Mon. We haven't talked for quite some time and he sounded really sad and wanted to see me and catch up. I feel so guilty about it but I don't want to talk to him. Idk ehat to say bc when I do talk it always turns into him apologizing for being a terrible father and never being around. Which I know sounds like sad anf I should forgive him but I've heard it so many times and he just turns around and does the same things-Ive had to hide knives and save him from killing himself multiple times. To make matters worse the anniversary of ny mother's suicide is this week and its just too much to deal with. I've cried myself to sleep almost every night this week and finally last night after my body was sore from sobbing, I woke my bf up to hold me. He didn't really very much- probably bc he was half asleep but all day today he has been so sweet and attentive. He ran all our Saturday errands while I took a much needed 4 hour nap. I can't say after all tumultuous and abusive relationships I've been in it's so relieving to have someone actually care and look after me.